Junk Jackson, July 2, 2006
I bought this album because the band name consisted of my three all-time favorite words listed in order. Seriously: Neutral. Milk. Hotel. I was like, "ohmygod ohmygod what's the chance?" Well, roughly 1/230,456,345,093,324,678...just like this album is one in a 230,456,345,093,324,678.
2. U2 - Like a Song, from War
In spanish, Bono is actually the first-person active form of the infinitive boner, which means, "to bone." I bet that dude caught a lot of shit for this when he was a kid. And on top of that, he had to grow up in the shadow of his father, Sonny Bono.
3. Wilson Pickett - It's Too Late, from Man and a Half
When Wilson Pickett says, "Woman, get in the goddamn car," you'd best get your ass in the goddamn car, woman.
4. Digable Planets - 9th Wonder (Blackitolism), from Blowout Comb
Best song on this album. But what is Blackitolism anyway? What are the symptoms? What kind of doctor specializes in this affliction? Dr. Dre? Dr. Octagon? Dr. Dooom?
5. Devendra Banhart - Rejoicing in the Hands
In a tale of great bravery and sacrifice, 11 New York firefighters and 17 New York janitors selflessly gave their lives to clean up the unimaginable amount of cum ejaculated by the Pitchfork editorial board after this album came out. As a result, the FCC has detained all good music -- without filing official charges -- and kept it from playing on American airwaves.
6. Outkast - Slum Beautiful, from Stankonia
I used to listen to this track in order to prepare for a role I had in a Broadway musical about hustlers. It was called Just Hustlin'. Ten bucks goes to the first contributor whose shufflelog brings up a track from Just Hustlin'. No, wait, make that one million dollars. I can do this because Just Hustlin' doesn't actually exist...much to Milty's disappointment.
7. Black Dice - Live Loop
It'd be awesome if peoples' birth certificates listed the songs they were conceived to. All the cool kids from my high school class would have Boston's 'More than a Feeling.' The theater geeks would have songs from 'Hair.' The band kids would have the "Na-na-naaaaa-na, hey!" song by Gary Glitter. Brox would have an Elton John/Billy Joel duet. The dropouts would have 'Search and Destory' from The Stooges' Raw Power. Everybody else would have something from Fleetwood Mac's Rumours.
The kid conceived to this song would be a robot. A boring, sterile robot.
8. Sam Cooke - Lost and Lookin'
When we were recording this song I told Sam to imagine a life without music...it's the kind of technique i use to get the best out of my talent.
9. Mission of Burma - Weatherbox, from Vs.
This band influenced the bands that influenced the bands that influenced the bands that the kids from Pitchfork listen to.
10. Digable Planets - K.B.'s Alley (Mood Dudes), from Blowout Comb
Two DP songs from the same album on the same shufflelog? When I finish, I'm going to ask Apple a very serious question about logarithms or whatever.